Who Am I?

January 5, 2015 § Leave a comment

The easiest answer to this question can be found in the way one reacts when things do not go the way you would like. When you do not get what you want. When your buttons are pressed. When shit hits the fan and you realize that what is actually happening is not the outcome you envisioned, it’s not happening the way it is supposed to. Suppositions are dangerous, possibly lethal, to long-term happiness if taken too far.

The upending of our expectations is fertile ground for practicing the yamas and niyamas. And since daily life is inherently full of upended expectations with very little guarantee of the certainty of our plans, we have lots of material to work with. ‘Grist for the mill’, as my teacher likes to say. The yamas and niyamas are the real yoga practice, folks. Asana practice just habituates us to the discomfort of not always having things go our way, of developing receptivity to what comes up, but backbending and putting your leg behind your head is kindergarten compared to walking away in a heat of an argument and holding your tongue from snarky retorts. Was it Tim Miller who said that Ashtanga is the ‘Yoga of No’? He couldn’t have been more accurate. It is totally the yoga of no because it is in encountering the ‘No’ that provides the opportunities for growth. Something tells me that 2015 is going to be about learning to embrace the ‘No’ in my life. I’m sure I will get through to the other side, but it will be quite a ride to get there.


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