Screw The Rules
February 24, 2014 § 2 Comments
Well this is typical. I caught a cold two weeks ago, and the moment things start to improve, I pick up the pace of my life as if everything’s back to normal, when of course, they aren’t – not yet at least. Picking up the pace in this instance means agreeing to all social engagements, running errands, working in the garden and doing my full practice (Primary + 2nd up to Ustrasana + backbends) regardless. Pushing through – after all, I don’t have a fever and therefore should be able to practice right? Right. All this while also adjusting to the addition of a cat to our household (i.e., crazy o’clock mewing) and not giving myself the time to recollect and reintegrate after a couple of sessions of deep, energetic, cranio-sacral bodywork.
The result? A searing burn at the back of my throat that I somehow managed to ignore through a full-blown practice last week that then erupts into a mouth ulcer, splitting headache, achey neck and shoulders and double the amount of mucus from the first round. In other words, I went beyond my edge, energetically more than physically. Managing all this energetic stuff is still a challenge to figure out – I’m often torn between wanting to use my time ‘efficiently’ (and therefore run a packed schedule), and listening to what my body needs, simply because I am afraid (scarred, perhaps) that slowing the pace will take me down the road of complacency and laziness, a path of no return, from which only bad things can follow. Delusional, I know. But it’s there.
In this case though, I certainly brought it upon myself by going too far, too hard, too quickly. It is a painful lesson in the importance of listening to the body in deciding how far to go in the practice on any given day – in terms of asana and effort. And to do this in spite of the voices in my head that remind me about ‘the rules’ from ‘the Source’ (6 day/week practice, no cutting corners, bla bla bla). Screw the rules.