Done? Never Done.
May 2, 2013 § 10 Comments
Recording this for posterity: Did three crash-free dropbacks today, thereby invalidating the narrative that “I won’t ever be able to dropback on my own”. Today’s event was necessary to prove the intuition I’ve had for a few months now – that my body is ready and fully capable of doing this, if I can get my mind out of the process for long enough. I need to work through this on my own, in my own space, without recourse to a pair of supporting hands or a familiar voice telling me “you’re fine”, “bend your knees” “yes, you can do it”. My teachers had become my crutches, and it was time to cast that away. The entire process took about 15 minutes I think. 15 minutes of pep talks, deep breathing, false starts and just hanging, frozen, in mid-air trying to figure out how to “bend my knees” to bring me closer to the floor without crashing.
The work that lies ahead is in cutting down that pep talk time, engaging the arms more so that they stay straight on landing and now, working on standing up. The journey never ends does it?
Still, I did it. I’m one step closer to demolishing the demons in this pose (are dropbacks really a pose?) and while the work continues tomorrow, today is reserved for basking in the glow of contentment and the ability to say “I did it!!”.