November 15, 2012 § 13 Comments
Marked my first week here with a led class this morning, which was not the best way to end a week/start a new one. Arriving 30 minutes before our start time, there was already a big group gathered on the steps, tightly packed, half-awake, all holding onto their mats in anticipation of the start. Before today I had heard stories about “the rush” for a spot for Friday’s classes, so I was somewhat prepared, but not enough apparently. The moment the 430 class did their closing chant, it just took one person to stand up before the contagion of anxiety began. You could feel the thoughts: “I want to get my practice spot”, “I want to get there first“, manifest in the body language. The hustling and rubbing of shoulders. The fake ignorance that you just elbowed someone with your yoga mat just to gain half an inch of space so that you can step into the room a millisecond before the person next to you in order to claim a “prized spot” for your beloved practice.
The transition – from the stairs to the room – was enough to put me off before the practice even started. I wanted to walk out, during the first Sun Salutations, I just didn’t want to be there. I hate the hustle, the blatant inconsideration and selfishness on display, and the vortex of “me first” energy that infects everyone and sucks you into it, defenceless. It’s a bloody epidemic of self-interest and makes the whole practice a joke after you’ve seen behavior like that.
I came out of the room vowing to spend Fridays practicing in my room, but after recuperating with a coconut, a chai and a lovely breakfast, I’ve decided to give this another chance. I will practice resisting the vortex next Friday. I will not get swept up into it, and I will let the hordes of picky practice spot Ashtangis pass me by. We’ll see if I’m capable of pulling it off, because it’s a lot harder than going through the Primary Series on Sharath’s count. Still, it wouldn’t hurt to set that intention.