After Effects

May 3, 2012 § 1 Comment

The general consensus among the population who made the trip out to Encinitas is that we are feeling the after effects of a daily, high-intense yoga practice. Most obvious is our general fatigue, and this is where I admit to being a bad lady and pushing myself through the latter days of a LH cycle where I would normally have rested. Truth is though, despite the tiredness, it felt really good to practice and sweat during the cycle. I have never felt better, my skin has never looked better, and my hair (thanks to the humidity along the Pacific Coast), looked like a million bucks with minimum effort.

This sense of wellness goes beyond the physical. Emotionally and mentally, I feel as if I’ve come back with a renewed perspective on my life, even though nothing has changed. These recent days spent reflecting on my current emotional state feels like I’m plunging into a deep tranquility, one that gives rise to a certain detachment, a more sensitive awareness of the ego’s impulses, and the understanding that I am truly free to do whatever I want, including taking care of myself and my needs. One of my intentions for the year is to cultivate self-compassion, and the experience of the past week went a long way towards helping me progress on that path. There’s a quiet confidence that it (really) is ok to give in to tiredness and take a nap. To ask for help, instead of expecting others to read my mind. To show vulnerability and openness, instead of projecting bravado. To not have a picture-perfect practice, instead of beating myself up. To take the time to sit out in the sun and journal, instead of staying cooped up in front of a screen. To take walks, just because. To say no, without fear of how the ‘no’ may be received. This is the kind of emotional freedom that I’ve been looking for. I sure hope it’s here to stay.

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